Son was up visiting today and we had some great little chats about all things watchtower. I would say the chances of him going back are real slim now, for he was telling me of some of his own WTF research on the internet about them.
Anyway, at one point he came up, gave me a big hug and said "thankyou for making me think"
It seems that all the little seed dropping and question dropping over the last 3 years really did work! It DID make him question the JWs and their hold on him and his sister. He did admit that he was at pain sometimes wondering why i was doing it though.
He related one event that really troubled him just a few years ago, he spoke to an elder and asked him, seeing that you say we will all be happy in the new system, and that my dad won't be there, how will i be happy? I will not be happy if dad is not there...Elders answer: Jehovah will just make it like that...trust jehovah. sons response to himself "what? is jehovah going to fill me with morphine or something?"
he called the JWS and the WT evil. An evil cult messing with kids minds and giving them nightmares.
anyway, lots of little reassuring stuff from him, he is loving his life out of the borg. I just wanted to share with those who may have teenagers trapped in there, dropping little hints that all is not well in WT land, and making them question, CAN WORK
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Thankyou all for the comments
this forum has given me life. All i can give back is my journey (as you will find under my posts) of my own awakening and the efforts to help the kids out. Perhaps i will find time to go thru all the posts and pull out the bits and snippets about the kids, its hard to remember all the little drops of questioning i used over the last 3 years or so.
Cantleave, more than happy for you to have reposted, i feel privleged even at the thought that i may in some little way help someone else one day.
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I have a question, how did you maintain communication? One of my kids runs hot and cold, sometimes we talk, other times he won't respond at all. With the other I have nothing, haven't for years.
I'd love to "drop seeds" as you say, but don't know how when I can't communicate.
My communication with the kids was limited to a visit once each two weeks. And it was very often for only a day. The ex had managed to manipulate access visits to bugger all time. There was no mobile phones for a long time. It was real tough at times wondering if they were even thinking about me inbetween visits even. and when they did come with a mobile phone, it was their mothers spare and i was forbidden to even know the number.
Once the boy had his drivers licence i saw him maybe every 3 weeks for a day. By that time i had secured 2 days each 2 weeks with the daughter though. I felt i had lost the boy to the JWs at that time.
I remember each time i saw them i was on edge as i so desperatlry wanted to talk to them, to get into thier heads, it was easier with my daughter. My son tended to close off, at times he would say that he knows now (before baptism) is the time to question but he just does not want to.
He went through a fair bit of therapy that blamed all his problems on me. he did blame me for all his unhappiness at that time too, so that was tough to swallow.
Still, i didn't stop dropping hints about the JWs and asking little questions anyway. I also think that his step father and his mother did a great job of driving the kids away from them and the JWs. He started to get into trouble with the JWs for having worldly girlfriend and getting drunk, how they they treated him repelled him from them more, he saw plenty of hypocrasy around him.
all i did was the best with the time i had...and sometimes i just avoided talking about the JWs at all in case they got jacked off that everytime they came to visit it became an anti JW session and not about fun.
At the end of the day, all you can do is carefully use the time you do get and rely on the fact that the WT manages to retain fewer of its young ones than ever before to help you...
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OK! Thats 3 years of tears and joy all in one BIG thread. I sincerely hope others can use it. I am not sure i did everything right, but i do know i did everything i could think of. I can thank many here, and the existance of the board in itself for the great help they have been. I really mean it, If this board had not come to be, i dont think i would have rescued my kids.
And on a final for this thread...
today my daughter turned 16...and we had a big gooey cake with one huge candle. Symbolic of it being her 'first' birthday
OZ